Grieving for somebody you never knew is an odd thing. Like, you never had them, but now that they're actually gone their 'not presence' is much worse. How could I possibly be so upset over somebody I've never shared a conversation with, or even a glance? If I knew, I'd tell you, and if I ever find out, well, I'll let you know.
The circumstances definitely impact the way you'll feel, how you'll react and deal with the loss. For instance; if it's sudden, maybe you'll be too shocked to show much of an emotional response at first. Then it'll hit you square in the jaw. The emptiness in the pit of your ribcage, and the burning regret that there was nothing you could do.
Of course, everyone is different. I'm referencing myself as if I were another to help ease what I'm feeling. It's silly, and I know he wasn't mine to grieve, but losing him really hit me hard. The more I listen to One More Light, the more it sounds like a note. A glaringly obvious goodbye.
I wish this post had a wonderful silver-lining to it, but there's none that I can personally fathom. The likelihood of it reaching my dashboard is low as right now I'm writing as an outlet, but if I do end up hitting publish and you see this, I hope you're happy. I hope you're fulfilled. If you're not, then I hope you find a way out of the dark.
It's worth it, I promise.
Signed,
Elijah.
Meta Sentience.
22/07/2017
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