...
Anyways, this blog got abandoned again. Not forgotten about, but I will admit I went out to get the milk for a few months. Okay, okay... half a year? I'm not sure. I haven't checked the date of my last post. It was probably shit anyway so let's forget about it, yeah? Hey, hey I said to forget about it. Don't you dare. Don't scroll down. Just let it be. God, why do you always do that? You always act like you know what's best for us. Just listen to me for once.
I have had a friend called Andrew. And that's what I wanted to write about in reality, but I needed time, a few months at least, to digest and compile what happened. I wish I could say that's what I did. I wish I could say that I put it all away and moved on, but in all honesty, being completely clear with you, I don't know what happened. I don't know why he stopped speaking to me. I don't really know what to tell you. I can only tell you my feelings towards what didn't happen. So that's what I'll do instead.
We were fine as far as I knew. Normal. A regular online friendship where laughter and mutual respect was abound... until it wasn't. Things were great for almost a year until there just wasn't anything anymore. Don't get me wrong, I give people their space. Hell, I socially hibernate all the time. People know to leave me alone and check in every once in awhile to make sure I'm alive. But this wasn't that. It went from every day, to every week, or even every couple weeks. That was fine.
Then it became a month and he didn't respond anymore. Nothing. Radio silence. Seems like a bit of a red flag, especially when you see you're being left on read. I don't like being ignored. One of my biggest pet peeves is being fucking ignored for no reason. I'd understand if we'd had an argument, I'd be glad of that because the reason for his disappearance would be obvious but no. Nothing. AWOL.
I'm now having thoughts of, should I even post this? Maybe I should write something normal, regular and boring to come back with... what if he sees? He would know more than anyone else that I actually don't care. He deserves to be verbally chewed up and spat out because of the emotional distress he caused me, not to mention completely ignoring his girlfriend through this shit as well. His girlfriend who happens to be my best friend.
I forgot to mention as well, it's not like he was completely gone and recuperating away from the internet. I would've understood that. But apparently he was perfectly capable of posting to all his social media and playing video games with his other friends. So... it was just my group of friends, including his girlfriend, he was ignoring. That was probably what angered me the most. As I said before, I hate being ignored with a burning passion. Don't want to talk to me? That's fine. Just fucking tell me. Not giving me a reason tells me that I'm not worth your time and nobody deserves to feel like that.
Maybe Hitler. I'd leave Hitler on seen.
Anyway, emotional dump aside, I heard from him and he apologised but didn't really say anything of value, and I haven't heard from him since. It's probably for the best, and I know I'll feel a lot better soon, but I gave a lot of myself to help him and he did the one thing he said he'd never do. So the trust is gone. Shame when that happens.
Signed,
Elijah.
Meta Sentience.
24/11/2019
I'm now having thoughts of, should I even post this? Maybe I should write something normal, regular and boring to come back with... what if he sees? He would know more than anyone else that I actually don't care. He deserves to be verbally chewed up and spat out because of the emotional distress he caused me, not to mention completely ignoring his girlfriend through this shit as well. His girlfriend who happens to be my best friend.
I forgot to mention as well, it's not like he was completely gone and recuperating away from the internet. I would've understood that. But apparently he was perfectly capable of posting to all his social media and playing video games with his other friends. So... it was just my group of friends, including his girlfriend, he was ignoring. That was probably what angered me the most. As I said before, I hate being ignored with a burning passion. Don't want to talk to me? That's fine. Just fucking tell me. Not giving me a reason tells me that I'm not worth your time and nobody deserves to feel like that.
Maybe Hitler. I'd leave Hitler on seen.
Anyway, emotional dump aside, I heard from him and he apologised but didn't really say anything of value, and I haven't heard from him since. It's probably for the best, and I know I'll feel a lot better soon, but I gave a lot of myself to help him and he did the one thing he said he'd never do. So the trust is gone. Shame when that happens.
Signed,
Elijah.
Meta Sentience.
24/11/2019
(Discovered and posted 13/08/2021).
